{"id":16740,"date":"2015-11-12T11:30:18","date_gmt":"2015-11-12T11:30:18","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.urban75.org\/blog\/?p=16740"},"modified":"2015-11-12T12:54:12","modified_gmt":"2015-11-12T12:54:12","slug":"peak-hipster-artisan-douchenozzlery-achieved-in-london-with-the-hot-water-bottle-cocktail","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.urban75.org\/blog\/peak-hipster-artisan-douchenozzlery-achieved-in-london-with-the-hot-water-bottle-cocktail\/","title":{"rendered":"Peak hipster artisan douchenozzlery achieved in London with the hot water bottle cocktail"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Peak<\/p>\n

As gentrification continues to sweep through London, cash-heavy, imagination-lite consumers are\u00a0swarming into the capital, some desperately seeking expensively manufactured thrills to provide a momentary throb of excitement in their ultra-mainstream lives.<\/p>\n

As always, there is no shortage of entrepreneurs ready and willing to take the moolah\u00a0off these creatively challenged cashcows, serving up sparkling trinkets\u00a0and gleaming baubles of capitalist pointlessness\u00a0for their increasingly frenzied stabs at gratification.<\/p>\n

Competition is heating up though, so ever-more\u00a0cod-bacchanalian eyeball-attracting delights are being\u00a0conjured up,\u00a0and perhaps the shark has been well and truly jumped with this ludicrous confection: the \u00a39 hot water bottle cocktail.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

\"Peak<\/p>\n

Yes, that’s right. It’s a bit of alcohol and cheap tea poured into a fucking hot water bottle and then served in a slipper. For \u00a39.<\/p>\n

The pricey concoction is\u00a0reviewed uncritically in this week’s\u00a0Bible of futile\u00a0consumerism, Time Out (above), where it’s revealed as ‘The Tod’ from the Cocktail Trading Company in central London. The owners of the bar are pictured in baby photos<\/a>\u00a0on their website.<\/p>\n

Wacky cocktails everywhere<\/strong><\/p>\n

\"Peak<\/p>\n

As the gulf between the haves and have-nots<\/a> continues to grow, there’s no shortage of cocktail bars popping up to serve the privileged elite, with zero hour, minimum-wage wallahs hired in to keep the fun flowing.<\/p>\n

In Brixton, credit card wielding daytrippers, tourists and incomers are invited to imbibe a\u00a0periodic table-inspired cocktail in\u00a0a bar overlooking a council estate<\/a> in one of London’s most deprived wards. Edgy!<\/p>\n

If that doesn’t take their fancy, they can roll with the prevalent trend of infantilism, throwing tenners at cocktails that come with childhood-yearning knick-knacks attached, like toy soldiers, model aeroplanes and a bit of gunpowder so you can make a bang like you did at school.\u00a0Keraaaazy!<\/p>\n

To help stave off the boredom, pricey cocktails inevitably come in a variety of ridiculous vessels and are\u00a0presented\u00a0on Instagram-friendly bits of wood, rock, slate or maybe a straw birds nest – and to ensure that you remember the fleeting ‘experience’\u00a0you can have a Polaroid\u00a0of what you’ve just spent your money on. Throw in some nibbles and it’s easy to burn through \u00a360+ in a few hours in the place.<\/p>\n

And all this is happening in Lambeth’s most deprived and poorest borough [—<\/a>]<\/p>\n

\"Peak<\/p>\n

Of course all this bullshit was predicted and parodied over 15 years ago by the masterful Chris Morris<\/a>\u00a0in his wonderful Bar Guide (screengrabbed below as it went offline some years ago).\u00a0Some of it wouldn’t feel out of place in this week’s copy of Time Out.<\/p>\n

\"Peak \"Peak \"Peak \"Peak<\/p>\n

See some more examples, join in with the conversation or maybe add some of your own examples here.<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

As gentrification continues to sweep through London, cash-heavy, imagination-lite consumers are\u00a0swarming into the capital, some desperately seeking expensively manufactured thrills to provide a momentary throb of excitement in their ultra-mainstream … <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":16741,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[196,194,456],"tags":[1307,1078,1308,1191,1302,1303,1304,1305,450,1112,1306],"class_list":["post-16740","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-nightlife","category-london-features","category-news","tag-bar-guide","tag-bars","tag-bored","tag-brixton","tag-chris-morris","tag-cocktail","tag-douchebag","tag-douchnozzle","tag-gentrification","tag-hipster","tag-infantilism"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/www.urban75.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/11\/peak-hipster-douchebag-2.jpg","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/pQI7P-4m0","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"amp_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.urban75.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16740","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.urban75.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.urban75.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.urban75.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.urban75.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=16740"}],"version-history":[{"count":14,"href":"https:\/\/www.urban75.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16740\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":16766,"href":"https:\/\/www.urban75.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16740\/revisions\/16766"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.urban75.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/16741"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.urban75.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=16740"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.urban75.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=16740"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.urban75.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=16740"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}