Glastonbury 2005: reports and reflections

'boiling vodka'
Report by twister, June 2005

Friday morning we all slowly woke up to the sound of thunder and heavy rain above our family sized tent. After battening down the hatches and doing up a joint prepared for a bit of a sit-in in the lounge area of our tent (boy was that tent worth bringing), we thought mmmmmm food.

We had brought a gas hob/stove with us, along with a plentiful supply of supernoodles and potnoodles plus some tea bags milk and coffee. All we needed was some water to boil

. As my mate Dan assembled the stove I scrabbled around to gather together the water we had within the tent (noone was up for braving the weather for the taps).

I found a couple of small bottles that we had filled up from the taps on Thursday that didnt have much in, so I kept on looking.



Finally found a 2l bottle on Evian about 2/3rds full in the big box we had with all the food, booze and camping equipment in. nice. I then sourced the potnoodles while Dan heated up the water. Indoors mind you! .. we couldnt put it outside as it was still pouring.

Probably not a great idea with gas n all, but it had to be done - we were hungry! Dan then leaves the water to boil and leans out the tent to chat to people as the weather improves. Me and a few mates are sitting round smoking, thinking 'f*ck this is going to be a washout'.

I'm thinking 'you muppet why didn't you bring any wellies'.



Suddenly BANG, the stove ignites into a ball of flames (inside the tent remember), and there's a stoned 'ooooh look at the flames' pause of about 5 seconds before anyone reacts - I jump up with one of the smaller bottles and throw it over the stove. HSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS, it goes out.

Dan meanwhile is completely unaware of the fact his parents tent we borrowed had nearly burnt down and was still leaning out the tent chatting! I take the pan off the stove and it stinks of gas.

Shit I thought, its leaking. washed it down and checked it all. it was fine. hmm. As the sun was now up(ish), put it outside, and relit it. It seemed fine.

Got some more water from the taps, boiled it up again (carefully) and filled 3 pot noodles. mmmmm, they were good.



Fast forward to sunday night.. its 7pm and i'm getting my shit together to go out. My girlfriends mate Gayle pops round for a joint and asks if we have any lemonade to go with her vodka she has.

I say I can do better than that and whip out a 2l bottle of sprite and a robinsons apple and blackcurrant concentrate. Mix it all together.. its gorgeous and she loves it. Nice.

Everyone leaves and I try to get my last bits together. Oooh, I think. I'll take out some of that concoction too as that was lush.



So I grab the Sprite and the Robinsons, as well as my hip-flask thing, and start looking for the vodka I had brought with me. I try to rememeber where I put the plastic bottle I had it in, and then as i'm searching for it I realise. I stand in my tent laughing out loud for about 30 seconds.. I was in stitches.... why? ....

We had boiled the fucking vodka 2 days earlier!!!!!!!!!!

Muppets.